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Friday, April 29, 2016

5 Annoying Things Parents Say to People Who Don't Have Kids (Link at bottom)

"I'm just saying that, even as a seasoned veteran in the parenting department, we need to be a little more considerate of people who haven't gotten there yet. Otherwise they're eventually going to snap and punch our crotches until we can't have any more."
 
He mentioned that these are exaggerations, but I disagree when it comes to my experience. A lot of the folks I know with kids act as though having simple ideas of how you would like to raise your future children is ridiculou...s! Well, its not. Even if things never go according to plan, at least you care enough to make one. At least you go in with the best intensions, which is more than i can say for a lot of people out there. We all know it's hard, and why wouldn't we?! Everytime the subject comes up, someone is right there to tell us how awful it's going to be and I refuse to go into that chapter of life with dread when the time comes. I know everyone just wants to share they're battle wounds and hard fought wars when it comes to their lives, but you have to remember too...
 
A lot of people out there who are looking forward to having children mean well. They may be talking about certain choices on how to raise said kid, the hopes, and how to be throughout the whole experience to give the best effort to accomplish the goals they are wanting to achieve... They may even disagree with you, and that's okay. Look, unless someone says to you that, "when I have a kid, I'm just going to leave it in a crib with a loaded gun for protection and plastic sheets for easy clean up while I go party..." I'm sure whatever childless person means well, and in my own experienced... they've discussed these plans with someone who will be on their side, who will help, and who will be a unified force when trying to accomplish whatever it is their shooting for in length. Most of us aren't pullng things out of our ass just to annoy you. Most of us are just looking forward to that chapter, and have teamed up in hopes that we provide the best life for our future children. That's all. We're not trying to tell you how to live your life or telling you that you're wrong... Most of us just make the mistake that you may think our opinion matters when it comes to every day subjects about kids, and they don't.
 

Monday, April 18, 2016

The Whole 30: It Will Be Worth It.

This is a blog written to myself about the Whole 30. When I get discouraged after I start my journey on May 1st, I can look back and remember that it's worth it and my excuses are not valid.
 
Excuse 1#: I'm going to say it's too expensive, and it's really not. I spent $129 in groceries for two weeks, and it won't last that long more than likely. Grilled meat and grilled veggies cost no more than baked meat and mashed potatoes. I just spend $8 on lunch at Wendy's when I could have bought some oranges ($5 for 10), Guacamole cups (6 for $4), Carrots (a big bag for $3), apples (10 for $5) and it would have lasted me 6 days (that's $2.84 a day for lunch instead of $8). For breakfast, I can always boil eggs and have some guacamole if I'm hungry - that's $3 for 12 eggs, and $4 for 6 guacamole cups. Again, that's only $1.17 a day for 6 days of breakfast. Dinner gets pricey, but not if I don't let it. A sack of sweet potatoes $5, 5 for $20 meats at Food City or Save-a-Lot, some frozen veggies are cheap, and various natural cooking oil - not a big deal. It would be under $50 a week, so that's about the same as I just spent in groceries alone, without eating out for lunch or breakfast. Overall, I would save money and I like saving money.
 
Excuse #2: Eating out. Put the bread basket down and look for simple dishes with the least ingredients. Steak and broccoli, chicken and asparagus, a salad with no croutons, cheese, or dressing (I'll bring my own.) Plan ahead, and don't worry about asking for exactly what you want.
 
Excuse #3: The weight isn't coming off fast enough. IT WILL. Look at your friend that did it! She didn't lose weight for the first 2 months and then BOOM! 50 lbs just fell off. That's incredible! Get through the first 30 and turn it into 90 and beyond!
 


Friday, April 15, 2016

Self-Care Friday #2

Do not project your own self-loathing and insecurities on others. Happiness is a state of mind. Don’t assume that simply because you are unhappy with an aspect of yourself, that others you see as similar share the same feelings. Pulling someone down by trying to use what you feel is a shared flaw is no way to get someone on your side, but it is a great way to crush them with your own feelings of inadequacy. It’s okay to seek open ears, get advice, and get those feelings of ...negativity off your chest – we all have them! What’s not okay is using the criticism you’ve created against yourself against others you perceive as the same. We’re not all the same. We’re not all unhappy with ourselves or certain aspects of our lives, but most of us are ready and willing you help if someone else is. Share a journey, not a road block. Enjoy praise and positive reinforcement. Refocus your energy on how to live fully and evolve. Not only do you deserve to be happy, but just like your negativity – it’s contagious.
 

This week self care looked like seeing a movie with my best friend. Taking a long nap. Working out with another friend. Asking for help with everyday chores. Asking for time off to make it to a doctor's appointment instead of stressing over how to work around or skip it.
 
Self care looked like shutting out those who feel insecure about their bodies, because they were projecting those feelings onto me. Don't assume just because you feel like you're fat or unattractive in certain clothing, that others your size feel the same way. It's insulting, because I certainly do not feel the same way and I don't see this person in the same negative light she sees herself. 


Friday, April 8, 2016

Self-Care Friday, #1

This is going to be a thing. Every week I'll post something about self-care as inspired by Wentworth Miller and his journey away from depression.
 
I have my own journey...
Many really...
Unfortunately, self care is not one of them.
I don't take care of my..
mentally, physically, emotionally.
When things fall on me, I let them.
When I get overwhelmed, I don't seek help.
When I'm anxious, I shut down.
It's a cycle, a bad one, and it should stop.
 
What did self care look like for me this week?
 
After a lot of work with the new house, I allowed myself to take a break. I did let some other stresses take hold, and became very overwhelmed on Wednesday when an old bill popped. This was a bill that was supposed to be taken care of my a family member, and wasn't. Since it was under Richard's name, we were responsible. This caused us to have less money than needed to pay the apartment what we owed them (I hate giving them money now that we have a house to care for, but our lease isn't up until April 30th). I scrambled to find money, and was able to solve the issue yesterday. After all of that, my self-care looked like napping. A nice long nap after work, 2 1/2 hours. I bought the dogs inside, and they got on the bed with me and we all took a nap. I work up feeling much better. I felt refreshed. I thought about going for a walk, but it started to rain so I stayed in.
 
The week before, self-care looked like eliminating products of judgment. I discontinued a few things that had been sold to me by a friend that was supposed to result in weight loss. I determined that these kinds of things were the direct result of now valuing myself and hating my body. I can't allow someone to assume I am unhappy with my body, because they, who may be the same size or similar, feels that way. Self-care that week sounded like saying no. Saying no to what I thought were obligations, but could not pack them into an already busy, anxiety filled schedule.

Next week I hope self-care will look like filling my body with nutrients and taking long walks around the neighborhood. These are my goals <3

Getting Bored

Before I start, I would like to mention that the move went well. We got 90% of our stuff moved out of the apartment, and we'll have about 3 weeks to get the rest and clean up. I'll post pics once things are more finished and settled. We have appliances coming Saturday and a couch coming Tuesday - those things are going to make life much easier around our home.
 
So to the point of this blog - I'm getting bored with Facebook.
It's the same old stuff every day, and not I'm having to dodge folks who have started selling through pyramids like the plague. I've mentioned my Plexus friends recently, and as much as I thought I wanted to try the one product, I bought it and accidentally threw it away with my recycling. I promise, it was pure accident, but I also took it as a sign that maybe I shouldn't take any of it. I'm not on any medication, so remembering to take those things everyday is tough. I'll just have to lose weight the old fashion way. Anyway, I'm getting off topic.
 
These folks selling stuff...
Since when is it okay to approach someone about their issues; what are you trying to say? If you weren't selling something, would you harass them about taking a weight loss product? Would you send them messages about acne cream? Would you talk about their regularity for no reason, unprovoked? Probably not... why? Because it's rude. I don't care what you're selling, don't approach someone and point out their insecurities just because you wanna make a quick buck. I have a few friends now selling Plexus, one selling Rodan + Fields, a couple selling Advocare, a couple selling Pure Romance (That one is okay, they don't bother anyone), I recently deleted one selling Shakeology (and blocked, because she STILL kept sending me stuff), and a few others just selling random stuff I've not heard of or aren't associated with these other schemey type of businesses. Three quarters of these people have the delusion that their not in a pyramid scheme, and that they've found the answer to their finances, but if it was that easy no one would work and we would sit at home all day on Facebook selling our products. I'm sure there are some people (very few) that make a living off these products, but most of the population finds it to be a simply source to make a few extra dollars while the corporation makes billions off their sales, recruiting, and their joining fees. Heck, I would sale it myself, but sometimes these sales tactics are so dirty, uninformed, and crazy that I could not allow myself to be on that level - unless I can truly tell you the truth about a product (the good and the bad), then I don't wanna sell it.

 
Some of the companies do not allow you to say anything negative about their product, or they'll fire you. Some you can't even say, "well I didn't benefit in this way, but I personally benefited in this other way", because that means your saying that the products aren't doing what they're advertised to do. This is why you see folks who sell these things offer to private message or email the consumer, plus this was they can skew their numbers without their friends and family seeing. I'm just making assumptions here and I'm getting off topic.

If you're selling something, please find a way to approach people that isn't harassing or degrading, even if it's your close friend find a way to build them up in lieu of breaking them down to get them to try a new product. You'll lose friendships, and most people are hard enough of themselves already.

DON'T BE RUDE.

Wednesday, March 30, 2016

This is really dumb...

A post on Facebook upset me today. I was having a similar conversation with a friend yesterday as she was trying to sell me other products from her Plexus line, but since I wasn't feeling like I was benefiting from them, I stuck with just the one thing she let me try  - something for energy since I've been working non-stop between my regular job and preparing the house.
 
Here's what she posted....
 
"I would like to clarify ........
When you say, "I DON'T NEED PLEXUS! I'm just gonna eat right & exercise, cause I can get the same results and it's way cheaper."
Here's the thing to really consider..
  •  How's your ‪#‎GutHealth‬? Is your ‪#‎BloodSugar‬ regulated/balanced? You can exercise all day, everyday, great!!! But if your gut health is poor, you have more underlying health issues that may hinder those workouts & keep you from reaching your full potential.
•Your body needs to maintain balanced blood sugar in order to avoid the peaks & valleys which can cause fat storage. It's very difficult for the average person to eat a balanced diet that truly keeps blood sugar regulated.
• You may be battling a yeast overgrowth in your gut, usually unbeknownst to you. It's nearly impossible to lose weight effectively if you have this internal battle going on.
• Similarly, if you aren't regularly eliminating then it's, again, nearly impossible to get rid of excess weight. Elimination is key! (Being "regular" means 2-3 times a day)
• You could be battling chronic inflammation which also slows down the process. Symptoms of this are: ongoing pain, allergies, high blood pressure, high blood sugar levels, fatigue, headaches & skin problems. Just to name a few.
‪- #‎Plexus‬ is not a quick-fix-weight-loss fad-diet. It's a lifestyle change that positively contributes to your overall health and wellness. So why aren't you interested in being healthy on the inside?"
 
The reason I'm upset is because she took what I said and made a sales pitch. Now, it's probably a copy/paste paragraph from her "upline", but nevertheless I hate this way of doing things and this is exactly why I wanted to stay completely out of it in the first place. I hate when people sell  things to friends like this, because it just ends badly if said friend isn't nearly as passionate for into it as the person selling the items. I love her, but seriously... I hate this.
 
Plus, it's wrong.
 - The whole gut health thing sounds nice, but it's just another fad (it's the latest craze!) If you don't know what bad gut flora you're dealing with, then probiotics aren't going to help you. Nothing will help you. Actually, pumping more meds, more low cal diets, and more fad diets into your system is only going to make your gut health worse.
 
- No everyone deals with "peaks and valleys" when it comes to blood sugar and it's very easy to eat a balanced diet that truly keeps blood sugar regulated. Just cut carbs. It's really not hard, but what is hard is to break the initial addiction. That takes a bit of time and determination.
 
- Hundreds, even thousands of people lose weight while dealing with this mythical yeast over growth that folks say we live with and have no clue it's there. Heck, a friend of mine lost 50 lbs changing her diet alone to 80% whole foods. (20% oopsy days lol!) I'll add two - ALMOST EVERYTHING YOU DO CAUSES CANDIDA GROWTH. Somehow, the world has lived with that and continues to strive. Long story short, it's not a real issues. Here's a good article about it: http://health.usnews.com/health-news/blogs/eat-run/2013/12/10/we-all-have-candida-and-its-ok
 
 - Balance your diet, and you'll poop regularly. I had constipation all the time until I started eating 3 squares a day and exercising.
 
- Chronic inflammation could mean anything. Having acne could qualify as chronic inflammation.
 
PLEXUS IS NOT A LIFESTYLE CHANGE, it's a product that should only compliment a lifestyle change. It should be an accessory to a better way of eating and living, but no... you 100% don't need it and if you can't afford it, don't let some jerk guilt you into draining your bank account by saying you otherwise won't reach some sort of immeasurable potential.

And please, stop using OTC drugs, dietary supplements, and non-medical based studies to diagnose yourself. All of these scientific studies were not done for fun or for only the benefit of those who performed the experiments. They actually have non millions of studies on meds that work for illnesses that matter for decades just for you. Use that knowledge.

"But Misty, you take Plexus accelerator."
Yeah, and I know good and well that the cure for my fatigue right now would be a better diet and more sleep. Neither of which seem possible with my busy schedule while getting the house finished so we can move in Saturday. I would also like to add that I worked over 30 hours over the weekend without it, so yeah... it's a "pick-me-up", but I still don't neeeeeed it.

I respect her wanting to make some extra money, and I don't reply to her post on Facebook no matter how incorrect or inaccurate they may be. I at least wish she would respect me and not act like my reasons for not buying more products is irrelevant.

Tuesday, March 29, 2016

Shine

I'm going to make a conscious effort to stop all of this. We should be able to feel things without putting on this fake front to pretend being tired, hungry, or sore is a reward of some sort. We should respect those who are overworked and over exerted any more than anyone else; we should feel empathy and compassion for them and hope their schedule changes. I used to pride myself on working long shifts, swing shifts, and staying up all night to pick up extra hours - not anymore. You don't realize how nice it is to have a regular schedule with consistent days off until you've gotten a job that provides that for you. My motto at work before getting a job with a steady job was, "I have to laugh, I have to laugh and be jolly or I'll cry". Wild schedules are depressing, working on holidays and weekend, missing family gatherings, going to work sick or injured - it all sucks, but that's our "working poor" way of doing things. It should not be so acceptable.
 
I drink caffeine and look for new and exciting ways to have artificial energy all of the time. I drink caffeinated diet soda, I've taken diet pills, I've drank energy drinks.... One time, I drove from Chattanooga to Springfield Missouri AND BACK, only stopping to pee - that's 24 hours straight driving, and by the time I was going over the mountain 45 minutes from home I was seeing things - no joke. I used to pride myself on how far and how long I could drive without stopping to rest - that was freakin' dangerous!! I would also pride myself on not allowing people to know my "break downs and inner turmoil", because keeping all of that private did not burden others with my issues. I was doing everyone I knew a favor (or so I thought). If there is anyone that knows about blurring the lines between "commitment and self endangerment" it's me. It took "burning out" to stop some of those things, and after readying the above statement I've realized I still have a long way to go in allowing myself to feel.
 
This society is on so many artificial things to feel certain ways, that I don't know how we ever know what's natural. I'm not talking about being sick, because you should certainly treat illnesses with medications. I'm talking about how folks reach for something every time they feel a certain way, and myself is included and I wanna fix it!
 
Feel tired? Grab a pill or energy drink.
Can't sleep? There's a pill for that.
Need a pick me up? Grab some caffeine.
 
Why is it easier to reach for a substance before analyzing out schedule? Maybe we're sleepy, because we're not getting enough sleep. Maybe we can't sleep, because we had too much caffeine to be awake - how hard is that to understand?
 
I want to be better about this.
The Whole 30 fixes a lot of this stuff.